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What works at work…and what will get you fired (and possibly arrested)

February 21, 2010

There are no words

Runway fashion is not for everyone. Haute couture may be cool for Lady Gaga to rock on a Friday night out, but most of us feel more than just a little draft if we go sans pants in public.

Apparently, Pamela Anderson is not one of those people. I don’t really think I need to elaborate on why this image is so wrong, or express my horror that designer Richie Rich has decided to use her as the celebrity face of his brand: Excuse my French but, bitch sells perfume at Rite-Aid. Here is where I am going with this: Unless you are an international sensation who performs with the likes of Elton John at the Grammys , or your place of employment contains a ceiling length metal pole, haute couture is not for you or your workplace.

However, the term “business professional” can be a little vague. What is appropriate dress varies from profession to profession, but there are certain things that are not, and will never be acceptable. Allow me to list them for you here…

1) Visible underoo lines (the word panty grosses me out, apologies), whale tales, and going commando. A.B.S.O.L.U.T.E.L.Y NOT
2) Cleavage of any kind (see aforementioned whale tales)
3) Jeans: This includes, but is not limited to: jorts, jongs, joutfits, joveralls, jeankets, and jirts
4) Wrinkled or dirty clothes. “College clean” is not an idea that transfers to real life. Here’s a helpful tip: Use a hair straightener to smooth wrinkles or remove creases on the go.
5) Last night’s makeup
6) Short skirts. Bring a chair in front of your mirror. Sit in your skirt in the positions you would normally sit (legs crossed, etc.). If you can in any way catch a glimpse of your Pikachu, it is too short! A basic rule of thumb is that anything knee-length is your friend. Watch out for slits though, they are the Heidi Montag of friends: not very reliable to stay the way they start out. Although they probably won’t preach Jesus at you while posing for Playboy…

Basically, don’t look like a cheap hooker. I won’t really advise looking like a high-priced hooker either. Many retailers offer collections of suits perfect for attending interviews or your first job. I personally reccommend Banana Republic’s Women’s Suit Collection. They offer beautiful essential pieces that will ensure you look appropriate while still appearing young and modern.
Banana Republic Sleek suit jacket & Martin sleek straight pant
TIP: Have your suit fitted by a tailor. A flattering fit is a must when it comes to womens (and mens) suiting. Many places provide tailoring free of charge when you purchase your suit, which will save you some serious cash!

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Linda permalink
    April 30, 2010 11:01 pm

    Pardon me, but, Pamela Anderson is starting to look like an old hag trying to relieve her youth! Take it easy on the make-up Pam!!! A little goes a long way! You would look sexier & much, much, younger with much, much, less make-up!!!!!

  2. Linda permalink
    April 30, 2010 11:03 pm

    Oops! I got a little bit carried away. The word I wanted to use is “relive” not “relieve”.

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